This is the only legitimate story of amnesia for me so far (I have a terrible memory but this one is legit). It was 2002 at the time and my brother had just passed away from suicide a few months before. I was staying sober through that tough time because drinking and drugging were becoming an obvious problem and I needed to turn my life around a bit. I had been separated from my boyfriend Derek for a year because of another crazy incident I may get to at some point. Derek had introduced me to the drug that had been ruining my life, so being away from him made staying clean and sober easier. I was 4 months sober when my brother killed himself and about 5 months sober when I saw Derek for the first time in a year. We spoke once and that was it, all the way back in that toxic relationship. He had told me he was 13 months sober but it turned out he was more like 13 minutes sober. That was the first time I had quit drinking and drugging and was dedicated to keeping things that way. I guess I thought that my sobriety could save him....turns out that's not how it works.

    The night I was supposed to get my 6 month chip at an AA (Alcoholic's Anonymous) meeting I had been fighting on the phone with Derek and was quite upset. (I am relaying all this information second hand from this point because I really got amnesia and lost more like a month of memory all together.) My mom said that I came to talk to her at 10:30PM (I was living with her at that time). I told her I was done with Derek FOREVER (I had probably said that 1,000 times) and I was going to get my things from his apartment. I never went and got my chip that night and can't remember why. My mom knew my behavior sober and could tell if I even took a sip of alcohol and told me that I was not using anything before I left the house at about 10:30PM. She told me that she had asked me not to go because it sounded like trouble, but I went anyway.

    At this point I only have the information I got from my family and to this day no memory of that night at all. My Mom knew what time I left and that at about 2:30AM she got a call saying I had been in a bad crash and it had taken them 2 1/2 hours to get me out of the car with the Jaws of Life. Her and my sister, Kerri rushed to the ER to find them still stitching my face up. I had smashed my car into a stone wall at about midnight and both witnesses (from separate cars) estimated I must have been going at least 80MPH at the time of impact. I had not been wearing a seatbelt but the airbag prevented me from being thrown out of the car. I had a severe concussion, at least 4 broken ribs and a compound fracture of the tibia and fibea (my shin and the bone behind it snapped in half and broke through the skin.) My mom said they let them in the room while still stitching my face because they still didn't know the extent of my injuries and weren't positive I was going to make it. I later found out from my Orthopedic Surgeon that they were talking about amputating my right leg but thank God he was able to save my leg/foot. 

    I remember them asking me if I had done it on purpose (It was a couple days later) and I realized I couldn't remember so I told them I didn't know. At that point they decided to transfer me to a nut house when I was ready to leave in case it had been a suicide attempt (remember, my brother had JUST killed himself).

    So, no one knows. Well, someone does but I don't. They said I had a lot of drugs in my system but I was sober and not associating with users except for Derek, who I was on my way to see that night. He says I never showed up. I find that hard to believe but no matter how I try I really can't remember any of it, or that night. 

    So once again, a miracle I'm alive! They sent me to the nut house and I was so out of it I still I can't remember that either. I don't know why Derek won't just tell me what happened but he's not big on honesty anyway. Either way they were able to save my leg but my sobriety went down the shitter at that point! LOL 

    So there you have it! My amnesia experience.